Well the title says it all. I need a job and instead of doing something about it, I'm blogging.
I just am fascinated with following others blogs and learning about their everyday life.
I have deceided to start blogging about my life. I'm hoping it will be therapeutic and help me deceide what direction to take in life. I miss my husband so much and everything about our everyday life together that we shared. From getting up in the morning and making his lunch and seeing him off to work and preparing our dinners and visiting each night about our day at work. He and I always enjoyed hanging out doing whatever we wanted even if it wasn't with each other. Just being in the same house with each other was so comforting. I miss even grocery shopping with my sweetie, going to the Mall or Walmart. I miss going for a ride or a ferry boat ride. I miss working in the yard with him. I miss him killing spiders for me. I miss his sweet kind gentle attitude towards me. I MISS EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM!!
We are on the verge of losing our home, I have already sold my car, his SUV, his truck and I can't afford to pay the taxes on our house. I will probably have to give the house back to the people who privitely financed it for us. I wish I could feel orginized in my mind and in my surroundings. Have you ever felt like your head is cluttered. That is how I feel. I have no motivation to do anything because I am depressed about my husband being so far away and no answers in sight.
He has been gone for 20 months and 7 days. I wish I had an answer, the lawyers (2 to be exact) were not successful in getting the US Consulate to review our additional evidence proving them wrong in thier decission to bar him for 10 yrs. UGH!
I have had the opportunity to visit him many times for which I'm forever thankful. I hate the goodbyes and especially when I don't know when I will see him again. I am thankful that I get to talk with him on the phone everyday. Sometimes it is very depressing to hear the discourgement in my husbands voice. I want to be able to fix everything and it is not possible. He always says just imagine "you still live in our house, I don't have a house" (he is living at his mother's) thank God he has somewhere to live. He says "you can find a job, I can't" He had everything taken from him and doesn't feel there is anything there for him. Yes his family is there but his life was taken away.
The man I love has been taken from me but nothing will keep our love from growing and nothing will separate us forever.
I care for my disabled Mom and have a lot of responsibilities with her. I also take care of the finances for her apartment where my Brother and Uncle live. I feel as if the weight of the world is on my shoulders sometimes. My husband was always my place of refuge, I miss him dearly. I always feel as if he knows me better than anyone.
Oh girl this is a very tough time for you. I know I asked this before but where is your husband. Maybe he should look into moving to a better location where there are more jobs. Most of the places Issacs been he has been able to find work. There is a silver lining I know 10 years seems like a long time but there are a lot of us out there who got life time bans. Not sure if knowing that helps. I know what you mean about not being able to get motivated with out him around. I seriously starts to get so hard after that long of a time. Im sure hes feeling the same thing.
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